Alive Again


For the first time in nearly two years I picked up a notebook and started writing. I didn't try to write in one of my old notebooks - for me that would be, in one sense, trying to change the pages of history. I bought a new notebook today to start a new chapter so to speak.

It wasn't easy to pick up a pen and write. Too many thoughts in my head all trying to get out at once. But I made myself write the first words on the inside of the back cover to "initiate" the new notebook. Then I finally turned to a blank page and began to write the first words of a what turned into a sort of poem... something I haven't done in far too long.

The words don't go together and the picture that they bring to mind isn't quite clear but then my thoughts aren't that clear right now either. It was like opening the floodgates and trying to make sense of the ensuing chaos. Words and thoughts spilled together and finally began to take some form on the page. Not the best I've ever written but that's not what matters - I am finally able to write again and, for the first time in nearly two years, I am beginning to really feel alive again.


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